Monday, June 7, 2010

Election Day Tomorrow

Here in California, we are having an important primary election tomorrow. Several weeks ago I saw a scrap of paper on a bulletin board at Fuller. It was covered in crazy looking handwriting--you know, the kind that is not consistent in size and capitalization. I wish I had run home to get my camera--it read something like:

HeLLO MY NaMe IS JOhN HaRRiS I Am A US CiTIZeN I Am RUNNiNg FOR GOVeRnOR OF CaLIFORNiA WRITe In CaNDIDATE SO PLeaSE JUST VOTe FOR Me OKaY

A few days later, I received the official voter's guide in the mail. Let me share a few statements by the candidates for governor:

"Build Solar Panel Factories. Install Solar panels on 10 million homes." (Democrat)

"I am a Christian living by principles in God's Word. I speak the truth ... I am qualified with an AA, BA (zoology/chemistry), MA (theoretical/research) and Ph.D. (clinical psychology)" (Republican)

"As your Governor, I will ensure all pedophiles will leave the State or volunteer to live confined to Santa Rosa Island, at no cost to Californians, as they will have their own self-supporting village" (Republican)

These are the people Brandon affectionately refers to as "Yahoos." And they are in the official voter guide. (The serious candidates are not.) How does a BA in zoology and a PhD in clinical psychology qualify someone to run the state of California? Because we are all a bunch of crazies who behave like a pack of wild animals? Hm, come to think of it, maybe those are reasonable qualifications after all.

Listen to this boast by Attorney General candidate Steve Cooley: "My office has ... obtained more death penalty convictions than any other district attorney in California."

I'm glad I'm not required to vote for any of these people. Tomorrow I will probably be leaving the majority of my ballot blank ...

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