Grief [not serious]

My glorious sandals finally bit the dust. I've had them since I was 13. I feel a great sadness--they were like faithful friends over these significant 8 years. And what's more, I've been reduced to wearing the flip-flops I've had since I was eleven. (I admit they are about a half size too small.) They're fine for slipping on as you take out the garbage, but after a while, they chafe.

*Sigh* ... it's hard saying goodbye to old shoes ...

(Not) Asking Questions

Since I've been in graduate school, I'm not sure if I've asked a single question in class. I do think of questions, but they're always things I'd rather figure out for myself than have the prof. explain to me. I suppose that's kind of the way graduate school ought to be. And also, I'm more interested in hearing what my peers think about subjects.

I do wish the format of these classes was less of the "classic" pattern--prof. lectures, students ask questions, prof. answers. I wish there was more class discussion--with not just profs., but also students answering other students' questions. And brainstorming sessions. And in Family Therapy and Pastoral Counseling, we could practice in small groups the kind of therapeutic exercises we're learning to use with people seeking counseling.

One of my classes is more like that. The first hour and a half is lecture, and then the second hour and a half is small group stuff. (Yes, that's three consecutive hours of classtime. Ugh!)

Well. Now I've just got to figure out how to try to get some changes going ... I doubt the current generation will ever change stripes. But maybe. Who knows?

orientation week

It's orientation week here at Fuller. One thing I've noticed about orientations--whether for college, seminary or a new job--is that they sure make people act weird. It's understandable. We've all been in some way uprooted. Many have left behind a support network of family and friends. Everyone is nervous, awkward, trying to look good and impress. Many people come off as overly confident, posturing, anxious to find their place in the pecking order.

It may not bring out "the worst" in people, but it certainly reveals an unflattering side.

The Mermaid Chair

My grandmother lent me a copy of The Mermaid Chair by Sue Monk Kidd. If it belonged to me, I would have torn it to shreds, gnashed bits of it with my teeth, contemptuously spit on the rest and burned the remains. Like what I did to a couple of the “Left Behind” books--though for different reasons.

My main problem with The Mermaid Chair is that it glorifies the protagonist’s adultery, making it out to be some kind of unavoidable, courageous, live-giving act. The way adultery is portrayed so often in books and movies, it would seem our culture doesn’t consider it to be, necessarily, a bad thing. But it is. And to call evil good is a vile injustice.

If someone were to write a book or make a film wherein the protagonist is having a mid-life crisis, and decides to bravely throw caution to the wind, and allow his desire to overtake him and rapes a 16 year old girl, then slashes her to death, thus freeing himself from the shackles of a monotonous marriage and coming to that wondrous realization that he can do something that will surprise himself--oh, yes, and he has no regrets, because the act made him feel so “alive”--if someone, as I say, wrote such a thing, people would be utterly disgusted. And they would know how I feel about The Mermaid Chair.

it figures ...

So, this afternoon I noticed there was a yellow light on on my laptop that I'd never noticed before. It turned out to be a little switch that enables the computer to detect and connect to a wireless network. As it turns out, all the time we've been living here, we could have connected to a wireless network for free, and instead we've been using a slow dial up connection.

Man. Ignorance is not bliss. Oh, yes, and of course, we are leaving on Tuesday. Well ... 4 days to enjoy wireless internet is better than none.

idol worship

People often say that idolatry in modern times means “putting anything in the place of God”--and people talk about how their career or their spouse or their own comfort becomes their “idol.” This makes the term “idol” very useful for thinking about sin in our lives.

But I think the original, intended meaning of the term is lost that way. When the Hebrew Scriptures talk about “bowing down to Baals” they mean paying obeisance (praying to, offering sacrifices to, and literally bowing down before) a carved image.

I think the carved images people were worshipping typically were meant to represent some awe-inspiring force in nature--like the cycle of the seasons, birth and death, sex, life-giving rainfall, sun and earth. The idea of worshipping any of those forces is foreign to Americans.

It may be because we are so far removed from the physical processes whereby such natural forces sustain life. The sun, rain (or rivers) and dirt are still responsible for giving us food, but we don’t feel that reality with our hands (sowing seed, turning soil) nor with our stomachs (full in times of plenty, empty during a drought)--instead, we go to the grocery store. We never worry about the grocery store running out of food. We’re not part of the process of food being grown and harvested or slaughtered.

We’ve even separated the act of sex from the cycle of birth and death. Nowadays, with birth control and modern medicine, sex is no longer necessarily an activity which is likely to result in birth and/or death for the woman and/or her child.

So, in 21st century America it would seem that the awe-inspiring forces of nature have been reduced to abstractions, trivialities (“I hope it’s sunny so I can go to the beach Saturday”) and inconveniences (“Oh darn; it rained, and the parade was canceled”). So, we don’t really have a problem with worshipping idols.

Of course, our way of life leads to problems of its own. It seems that part of what the Hebrew Scriptures teach is that instead of worshipping blocks of wood or stone that we ourselves carved into images, we should recognize that the true creator and author of the earth and its fullness--the person who’s actually responsible for sending the life giving rain and the terrifying snow storm is YHWH, the God of Abraham, and of Isaac and Jacob.

So, it would seem if we’re not even inspired to worship of nature, we may have a hard time giving God the worship that is his due. I don’t know. Maybe not. Maybe we just are more inspired by intellectual, interpersonal or cultural stuff that gives God glory, since that’s what our lives revolve around.

I only slept for 3 hrs. or so last night. My insomnia was probably due to anxiety/excitement about our impending move. Ack! So much to do, still!

patriotism

This was going to be Blog Sermon #2, but it’s not organized and concise enough for that. So, it’s just my rambling, lengthy thoughts on patriotism.


Independence Day was a little more than a week ago. I had occasion at that time to think a little about patriotism.

Of course, one aspect of patriotism is appreciating what’s good about our country. There are lots of things. Freedom of speech, for example. It’s nice not having to worry about the secret police showing up to murder you because you bad mouthed the current president. And freedom of religion. It’s also nice not having to worry about your Uncle Leo “disappearing” because he was caught trying to convert someone to Christianity. There are lots of nice things like that which (as the cliché goes) we take for granted. Part of patriotism is being grateful for stuff like that. And naturally patriotism may mean, for some, taking up arms to protect the inhabitants of our country from violent invasion. Those two things are the typical version, I think.

But I think the attitude we hold toward the nation we live in (that is, patriotism) ought to take into account not just the good things about our country, but the evil as well. And as I see it, there are basically three attitudes one can adopt toward the wickedness of America:

-We can ignore it, pretending it’s not very important.
-We can wash our hands of it, condemning it as if from the outside.
-Or we can admit that we take part in it and work to change it.

When we talk about it in an abstract sense, it’s easy to see which attitude reflects genuine love for one’s country. But what do these attitudes actually look like?

People who ignore America’s faults may never actually say that we can do no evil, but they act as if it were true. They may decorate their house with American flags, and sing loudly along with the national anthem at baseball games, enjoying the rush of exuberance springing from their patriotic pride, and they may just not happen to think about people who experience a different side of life in America. Neighborhoods ruled by street gangs and children being beaten and treated as slaves by their drug addicted parents--it’s not exactly the “America” which such “patriots” are so proud to be a part of.

And on the other hand, there are people who act as if they are not Americans at all, who want to wash their hands of the whole thing. They may be grateful for the good things about our country--freedom, prosperity, etc.--but bring up the war in Iraq or the over-crowded prison systems and what do they say? It’s all our idiot president’s fault. It’s all because of those bureaucrats in Washington and the ignorant Christian Right and so on and so forth.

I think this can be a step in the right direction toward true devotion to one’s country. God himself certainly “talked trash” about the nation he had chosen and loved. In the books of the prophets especially, God laments, God rages over the sins of Israel and Judah. But God does more than complain. First, God sends prophets; then he disciplines. He does not despair of ever redeeming his disgraced “holy nation”; he does not destroy the lot of them. When he does destroy, it is for the salvation of those remaining.

And of course, after sending messenger after messenger, and using one foreign nation after another to teach the Israelites a lesson, at last God sent his own Son. Again, my point is that God never overlooked the faults of his beloved nation. He never said, “Well, all the idol worship and bloodshed is not what I had in mind, but they’re my country, right or wrong.” Certainly not. But God also never gave up on the nation that he loved. Instead, he actively engaged with Israel, as a nation--he struggled against Israel in order to redeem them.

We have been set an example--not to wash our hands of evil, and not to overlook it, but to charge into the breach. We are to engage with our nation’s political system; it is our duty as devoted and loyal citizens to struggle to overcome America’s evil.

The first step is recognizing America’s faults--saying “Yes, our culture is driven by greed; yes, our economy exploits third world countries; yes, our lifestyle is creating unfathomably gargantuan heaps of garbage. I acknowledge all of these things. And I acknowledge I am part of the problem, but I will work to make it better.”

And again, this is what makes a true patriot different from a mere cynic. Someone who loves their country will not just complain about how bad things are. He or she will acknowledge that it’s not just “America’s problem”--it’s my problem, it’s your problem.

And I am part of the problem. Whenever I wear skimpy or revealing clothing--or if I were a man, ogling at a bikini beach--then I am contributing to America’s sexual addiction. Whenever I turn on the t.v. instead of, say, having a conversation with someone--I am supporting America’s interpersonal isolationism. And when I fondly dream of owning a nice car or getting a new stereo system--as advertised on the commercials, of course--I am buying into America’s culture of greed.

It is my duty, as an American, to be part of the solution. To be informed. To be aware of the portion of the nation who live in fear of drive-by shootings and gang rape, for example. It’s my duty to seek out opportunities to do something about it--to mentor a middle-schooler who lives in Compton. To find “green” ways of living. To support a free clinic for people who can’t afford health insurance- --anything, something, whatever--but the point is to be part of the solution--cause if I’m not … then I’m part of the problem.

Praise be to Christ Jesus, through whom all things are possible, including making a real and lasting difference by living out God’s redeeming love for our neighbors here in the country we happened to be born into. May God be glorified in our struggle to reform and redeem America.